I was going through the thousands of pictures of my laptop looking for a very specific picture of you and I from that wedding. I randomly clicked on a screenshot that I absolutely couldn’t read other than I thought it said “Robbina” which is what you were saved in my phone as.
I opened it up and the message read:
“I hope your aneurysm bursts and you go to hell!”
Ouch. I’m probably the only one that could read that and smile right now. I know why you said that and I know why you wanted me to see that screenshot. I forgive you.
That blog post that detailed the night we met.
Again, going through files on my computer, all my blog posts are saved in Word but they’re not titled, just numbered. I clicked through a few and I couldn’t find it anywhere. Between each click and scouring through our old LiveJournals, I began to think I was imagining the whole thing and began sobbing. I thought I was legitimately losing my freaking mind. That is when I accidentally opened one (my laptop is touch screen) and... THERE IT WAS, in full detail. 🤯
For those that don’t know, IWTFY is a blog I’ve read daily since 2007. I even have two books that are compilations from the author, one of which Robby bought for me. So I randomly went to the blog and it had me sign of for a newsletter which I normally would never do but for some reason I did.
Promptly in my mailbox, I received an email for this very special, 54 page writing titled “Why I’m Sending This To You” which you may read here: https://jonellisphotography.files.wordpress.com/2019/11/why-im-sending-this-to-you.pdf
(It’s amazing that after 14 years, Iian Thomas still knows the words I need to hear.)
3 drips from the faucet from our nondripping bathroom sink. We had this long running joke about girls not pooping and I used to tell you I was gonna send evidence one day so I’m sitting there and I asked you if you were watching lol. I looked around the bathroom for a few seconds to see if anything moved or flickered. Nothing. Then... our faucet which absolutely does not leak dripped 3 times. That was it. I watched it for a couple more minutes to see if it dripped again and nope. I don’t know if it’s significant or not, but our anniversary was December 3rd.
And a few times now just as I’m about to reach my destination one of your songs will come on, and I’ve gotta extend my drive so I can listen to it.
Ohhhhhhhhh there was this other time too. I was sitting in bed and stewing over whether I should stay home from your viewing as requested. So I asked you to give me a sign. I asked you to give me a sign if you didn’t want me to come. I waited about 30 seconds. Nothing. Then I asked for a sign if you DID want me to come. Listened for about 30 seconds. Nothing. THEN I all of a sudden hear this loud ass heartbeat. I felt the dogs’ chests to see if it was them. It wasn’t. It wasn’t mine. No TV on. Nothing. It only beat maybe 5 times and then stopped. I thought it was crazy but as I’m telling it now I guess you were probably saying to listen to my heart.
Although, your message would’ve been loud and clear if I’d just opened my fortune cookie that came with the Chinese food I ordered and didn’t eat that night your sister messaged me. Unfortunately, I didn’t get that message until the day after your viewing so I did ALL that stressing for nothing.
The fortune cookie read: “You are always welcome to gatherings.” 🥺 Thank you.
I randomly worked with someone from a different store, whom I never met, and of course she was the oldest of 5 and was homeschooled until she went to Eaton Rapids because that’s super fucking common and whatnot.
I am a HUGE skeptic. I question EVERYTHING. But I can’t find any logical explanation for most of these occurrences. They are FAR too accurate to be coincidence. Nothing can convince me otherwise.
Thank you for making this less hard on me. I truly didn’t know if I’d be able to survive this. I feel your presence. I know you’re still here. You’re more here than you’ve been in years. I feel it. I know it. I love it. Please don’t leave me. 🖤
